According to one expert anonymous, random internet commenter, an epidemic of insolence and impropriety is threatening American ideals. Perhaps…

According to one expert anonymous, random internet commenter, an epidemic of insolence and impropriety is threatening American ideals. Perhaps “lolcat24601” is correct. There have been some absolutely APPALLING behavior displayed by some of our finest model citizens like frustrated tennis champions and ego-maniacal music stars. Friends, this epidemic is sweeping the nation. Nay, it is rapidly metastazing and spreading around the world like some horrid cancer. To fight such an epidemic with the utmost polite ferocity, I can only recommend that you say the magic words “Please” and “Thank you” at every given moment and say “excuse me” empathically when you do something indecent like coughing uncontrollably because you have asthma or the swine flu. When you are trying to insult or demean someone, or when you are attempting to express frustration, is it so difficult to express your disdain for a particular person or situation in a more polite manner? For instance, if you were engaged in a conversation with a very talkative man who is preventing you from going to work in a punctual manner, I would recommend you say with the utmost kindness “Sir, pardon me, but I believe you are a blithering idiot and I would kindly appreciate it if you shut your trap, please. Thank you,” rather than haul obscenities at him. I shall be living in a dimly-lit cave from now on as I cannot bear with this impoliteness. At least rocks and dead animals do not interrupt people in their moment of glory. – Allyson